Monday, March 30, 2009

Attn: Everyone - Recall Notice!

Recall Notice

The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units, code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed "Sub-sequential Internal Non-Morality," or more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.

Some other symptoms include:
  1. Loss of direction

  2. Foul vocal emissions
  3. Amnesia of origin
  4. Lack of peace and joy
  5. Selfish or violent behavior
  6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
  7. Fearfulness
  8. Idolatry
  9. Rebellion
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this SIN defect. The Repair Technician, Jesus, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.

The number to call for repair in all areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R.

Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component. No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:
  1. Love
  2. Joy
  3. Peace
  4. Patience
  5. Kindness
  6. Goodness
  7. Faithfulness
  8. Gentleness
  9. Self control
Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B..L.E (Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded.

DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace.  The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.



Thank you for your attention!

-GOD
 
P.S.  Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice, and you may contact the Father any time by "knee-mail."

Saturday, March 21, 2009

40 Day Giveaway

Wow. It's been a while since I've written here. Didn't realize it had been this long!! Sorry!!

I wanted to tell y'all today about something I should have mentioned a really long time ago!! This guy Flip (member of phatmass, point5covenant, SMU alum, Catholic center worker, friend of dUSt, etc.) has been video-blogging his lenten journey. Here's the premise:

For Lent 2009, I have selected 40 items in my closet/apartment and will give each item away daily until Easter.

It really is that simple. Each item has some meaning to him and he gives a little history about everything he gives away. His videos are fun and fresh. And hey! If you live in Dallas and don't get out much, you'll probably discover some fun new dives. I've been to most of the places he's been blogging from (and love them just as much) but I did "discover" a coffee shop I hadn't been to before. Sweet!

Click the picture to see his project!! You won't want to miss this!

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Runnin' the Race

I was talking to my friend Katie this morning and she though this would be "blog appropriate." Here ya go:

I’ve been keeping a journal for the past couple of weeks. When I started it, it was just a journal, just a place to write down what was happening and how I felt about it. It was alright for a while but I wasn’t sure how long I would actually keep it up. As can be seen here, I have a hard time writing when expectations creep up.

I was talking to a friend one morning about it and told her I decided to make my journal letters to God. We had talked about needing to develop a more personal relationship with God and this was my way. I do best when I write. I can write to God like I would talk to her. I started that same day.

It’s been about a week now and it’s been wonderful. I love it. And I love this personal connection I’m beginning to develop. I’ve never had a connection like I have now. I’ve had a connection, but not an intimate one. It was always very formal, rigid, uncomfortable.

This morning while I was driving to get coffee I was reflecting on this development in my life. And then it came to me:

God is like a good race spectator: forever cheering you on - even when and ESPECIALLY when you are slowing down, feel like you might die, and really just want to throw in the towel. He’s the one waiting for you at the Finish Line cheering like you’re the first person ever to cross it even though a thousand more have crossed before you.

His graces are to the soul what water is to the body. They’re available to everyone but only you can choose to receive them and to be nourished by them.

Pretty cool, huh?